Friends and Caregivers

. I Don’t Go To Funerals Or Nursing Homes By Phil Morgan I have met a surprising number of adults who have strong feelings against going to funerals or visiting in nursing homes. Frequently, children are also insulated from these realities of life when mom and dad don’t visit during these times of need. Admittedly, these are difficult choices for everyone. To some, a visit to a nursing home is so depressing that recovery takes weeks. Funerals can be horrifying experiences, leading to nightmares and scenes which we cannot get out of our minds. Others fear not knowing what to say, or the embarrassment caused by an uncontrollable display of emotion. But how sad to let such things keep us (and our children) from comforting the suffering or consoling the grieved. How sad to live a life of vague denial, only to one day reach its end and be unable to do anything more than feel cheated. We live in a society that prefers to ignore painful, unfavorable realities. Sickness, disability, and death are viewed as unwelcome intruders who come to steal away a loved one or the happy, healthy, carefree life we are "supposed to have." It is unfortunate, and unnecessary, to develop such negative feelings toward the inevitable. A 17th century preacher named Increase Mather received from a friend a letter asking if he was "still in the land of the living." "No," he replied, "I am in the land of the dying. I am going to the land of the living." Please read Ecclesiastes 7:2-4. God is not recommending a morbid preoccupation with sorrow and death, but He is asking us to be wise and embrace such things as the realities of life. When we come to understand "that death is the end of every man," we have made a giant step toward right living in this life, and toward proper preparation for the life to come. As a preacher, I understand well the difficulty of going to such places. Yet, consider for a moment how much more difficult it is for the person in the home, or the family, who has lost a loved one, if you are not there. Just being there says more than a thousand words! http://www.knollwoodchurch.org Better to go to the house of mourning Than to go to the house of feasting, For that is the end of all men; And the living will take it to heart. Sorrow is better than laughter, For by a sad countenance the heart is made better. The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, But the heart of fools is in the house of mirth. Ecclesiates 7:2-4 .

		. .  Gift Ideas for Those in Nursing Homes * (If you bring food be sure it doesn't interfere with any special diet they may be on.) Home cooked meals and desserts. Food from a favorite restaurant or A hamburger from their favorite fast food restaurant. Candy. Fresh fruit. Milkshake, coke, or a favorite drink they can't get in the nursing home. A padded sheepskin cover for their wheelchair, chair, or bed to make them more comfortable. Check out their pillow. If it is a standard nursing home pillow, hard and flat, then bring them a nice pillow that fits their needs (some may need more height, others don't). Note cards and stamps. Box of various cards (birthday, sympathy, thank you) and stamps. Something to do with their hands. Books, magazines. CD of songs, hymns, sermons. Children's drawings. Photo album filled with pictures and comments from friends, family, or local congregation. Church bulletin as well as news of the local congregation. Well behaved children and babies. Well behaved small dogs with permission if the one you are visiting is a dog lover. Hymn book. Decorate their rooms for the holidays. A magnifying glass. Crossword puzzles, jigsaw puzzles, word games. Don't forget a pencil with a pencil sharpener.   Can you think of some other good gifts to bring to one in a nursing home?  Please use this comment box or email it to ourhopeonline@gmail.com and put "gifts for nursing home" in subject line. . .

Is there a topic you'd like discussed concerning caregiving? Would you like to submit an article, poem, or thoughts on caregiving or friendship? Please use this comment box or email it to ourhopeonline@gmail.com - put "caregiving" or "friendship" in the subject line.

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