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. What Will They Remember By Cindy Granke
Several years ago, Michael Jordan’s father, James Jordan was murdered, and his body was dumped near a small, South Carolina
town. In an interview with New York Post's Bob Green, the basketball star had some interesting things to say
about his parents, and in particular, his father. Michael said, "My heroes are, and
were, my parents. It wasn’t that the rest of the world would
necessarily think that they were heroic. But they were the adults I saw constantly, and I admired what
I saw. I don’t know how many children can say that.
"My father was, and is, a very smart man. He was homemade smart - he never went to college. So he made himself smart
in sense. He learned about things all by himself, and that taught me something about making yourself better
"If you’re lucky, you grow up in a house where you can learn what kind of person
you should be, from your parents. And on that account, I was very lucky." I wonder how many of us can say the same about our relationships with our
own parents. And how many of our children can say the same about us, as their parents? Every day, and in
every way, we are showing our children how to live, how to cope with the stresses of living, and what is acceptable, and what
is not. Perhaps we would be wise to ask ourselves a few questions with regard to what our children will recall about us, when
they are grown up and away from home.
1. Do my children look at their parents as their heroes? What will they remember about the way we
handled stressful situations, discouragement, and difficult decisions? Will they remember that we prayed (Phil. 4:6), and
sought guidance and encouragement from God’s word (Isa. 25:4)? It is sad, but many grown-ups cannot
remember ever seeing their parents kneel in prayer. Does your family pray together? Do you kneel with your children, during
the day, to pray with them? If not, now would be a good time to start. 2. Will my children remember me as strong, yet controlled (“meek,” Titus 3:2), and that
I did everything within my power to live peacefully with others, whether they were other family members, neighbors, or disgruntled
brethren (Rom. 12:18)? Or will they recall that I was selfish, short tempered, and quick to fight (Prov.
14:17, 29; Eccl.7:9)? 3. Will my children remember that I did what I could to improve our family physically, mentally,
and spiritually? Or will they remember that I indulged in self-pity, waiting for others to do things for me, and to provide
the things our family needed (2 Thes. 3:10; 1 Tim.5:8)? Will they remember seeing me with an open Bible,
studying and trying to grow spiritually (2 Tim. 2:15)? Children who grow up in families where the Bible
is dusted off and set out only when brethren are coming to visit, will probably look at their own Bibles as mere ornaments
when they have homes of their own. Will my children remember me as one who lived and practiced what I preached (Rom. 2:21-22)?
4. Will
my children's memories be of me showing them, by my words, as well as my deeds, what manner
of persons they ought to be? We are our children's guiding light (Mt. 5:16). If our light is dim or uncertain,
they can lose their way. I’m reminded of the words written by Annie Johnson Flint, in 1919.
We are
the only Bibles The careless world will read,
We are the sinner’s gospel, We are the scoffer’s creed;
We are the Lord’s last message Given in deed and word,
What if the type is crooked? What if the print is blurred?" "What if our hands are busy With other things than His?
What if our feet are walking Where sin’s allurement is?
What if our tongues are speaking Of things His life
would spurn,
How can we hope to help Him And welcome His return?" (The World's Bible)
5. Will my children look back,
and remember that they were loved (Titus 2:4)? Or will they have doubts about my affection for them? Have
you ever heard another adult wistfully say, "I wish my mom had told me she loved me, just once"? Perhaps
they recall, "There was never any hugging or affection shown in our family." Those who
received little affection as children, usually find it difficult to love, or to
show affection to their own children later on, because they just don't know how. Sometimes, remembering what we never had
brings us sadness and pain, and our hearts ache for what we missed. Let us be diligent in showing our little
ones that we love them. 6. When
my children are grown up, will I look back and feel confident about the way I raised them? Or will I feel guilt over things
I said and did, or neglected to tell my children, or do for them? Perhaps, when we think back to our relationships with our own parents, when we were growing
up, we can recall those things we were thankful for, and things we wish had been different. We can compare our relationship
with our children, and make adjustments accordingly. Most importantly, let us bring them up according to God's word (Eph.
6:4). He gave us a lot of guidelines for parenting. Michael Jordan
was right - he is lucky. He has memories of his relationship with his father, without regret for what might have been. Will
our children feel they too were lucky they had us for their parents? cg
WHAT I TAUGHT MY CHILD TODAY
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/ When I got mad today and hit my child "For
his own good", I reconciled, And then I realized my plight... Today, I taught my child to fight.
~
When interrupted by the phone, I said, "Tell them I'm not home." And
then I thought, and had to sigh... Today I taught my child to lie.
~
I told the tax man what I made, Forgetting cash that was paid, And
than I blushed at this sad feat... Today I taught my
child to cheat. ~
I
smugly copied a cassette, To keep me from one more debt, But now the bells of shame must peal... Today
I taught my child to steal.
~
Today I cursed another race, Oh God, protect what I debase, For
now, I fear it is too late... Today I taught my child to hate. ~
By my example, children learn That
I must lead in life's sojourn, In such a way they are led, By what is done, not what is said.
~ Today I gave my child
his due By praise for him, instead of rue. And now I have begun my guide; Today
I gave my child his pride. ~
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~ I now have reconciled and paid To
IRS all that I have made. And now I know that this dear youth,
Today has learned from me the truth. ~ The alms I give are not for show, And yet, this child
must surely know, That charity is worth the price; Today he saw my sacrifice. ~ I clasp within a warm embrace My
neighbor of another race. The great commandment from up above;
Today I taught my child to love. ~ Someday my child must face alone This fearsome undertone,
But I have blazed a sure pathway; Today I taught my child to pray.
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Author Unknown -
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