Sojourning in Distant Lands Archives 2007

God’s Providential Care and Peanuts  by Joanne Beckley  Recently, my husband and Ron Chaffin returned to South Africa from Zimbabwe. After supper, they finally told Carol and me of the following event. Afterwards, all of us thankfully attribute their safe return home to our gracious Father’s care for these two men. Homeward bound, the men were stopped several times by police roadblocks. The car was searched, and they went on their way – only to be stopped yet again and searched. Continuing down the road after one such forced stop, Ron accidentally broke his packet of peanuts and they scattered everywhere. In the process of collecting the peanuts, he reached blindly behind Dave’s seat to pick up even more – and came up with a piece of glass. Examining the glass/rock, they noticed it had cut facets. Amazed, they discussed what it was and where had it come from. Deciding that the unknown was possibly dangerous, they tossed it far out the window – and soon arrived at the next roadblock. This time Dave asked the police woman what they were searching for? “Diamonds” was the succinct answer. Was the “diamond” planted at the previous police roadblock? We will never know. But this trip could have had a far different ending, and in this unstable country, my husband and Ron would not have returned home. I am still thanking God for peanuts.  Take a moment with me to consider the providence of God, especially whether or how He works on a personal level in our lives. Events happen in our lives over which we have little control. It is during these times that it is good to pause and consider this gift from God.  Because we as Christians address our prayers to God, we recognize His divine characteristics of being all powerful, all knowing, and full of mercy toward us (James 1:17). We believe God is holy, righteous, and sinless. We know He loves us. We know that He has the ability to supply what we need, with the right to choose to exercise that ability. We have learned these truths from His holy word. Most wonderful of all, God assures us of His willingness to hear our petitions because we have been redeemed by the blood of Jesus Christ (Philippians 4:6; James 5:16-18).  If we believe these truths, we will confidently beg God to be with us at all times, and especially when we are faced with temptation and unexpected dangers. If we believe Him to be all powerful and fully aware of what is happening to us at all times (James 1:6), then He is free to exercise His providential care in our lives (without anxiety, with His peace - Phil.4:7). We cannot say with certainty (no direct proof) that this event or that one has been affected by His choice and care, whether as testing or in saving our lives. We cannot know with certainty that He is allowing Satan to try to influence us to reject God (Job 1,2). We can give thanks, knowing He will always provide what is good for us. We can accept that with God’s help it is possible to spiritually grow from whatever experiences we face on a daily basis.  The subject of providence in our lives becomes very personal to each one of us. We desire God’s full concern for our own specific joys and problems. Yet, we must understand  God has a time and purpose, and His providence on a personal level is subject to His plan and His foresight. We must learn, as the preacher said, to “fear before Him” (Eccl.3:14). Sin and wicked men are ever before us. Their actions will affect us and we cannot control them. We can look to God in his providence to help the situation, while understanding He may be proving, testing you and me (vv15-18), thus we are to prove, test ourselves (2 Cor.13:5). The preacher summarized his thoughts by telling us God is the final judge of how we should respond to His will and to good and evil (12:13,14). Jesus himself urges us to work with God, not against Him. God will provide what He knows we need and we are to do our part by seeking Him first, from the beginning, and not relying on our own questionable wisdom (Matthew 6:25-34).   We do not live lives believing “whatever will be, will be,” having no say or ability to change our circumstances. Our obedient lives for Christ and our trust revealed in our petitions truly do affect God’s willingness to extend his providential care to us.  Psalm 34:14-19 Depart from evil and do good; Seek peace and pursue it. The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous, And His ears are open to their cry. 16 The face of the LORD is against those who do evil, To cut off the remembrance of them from the earth. 17 The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears, And delivers them out of all their troubles. 18 The LORD is near to those who have a broken heart, And saves such as have a contrite spirit. 19 Many are the afflictions of the righteous, But the LORD delivers him out of them all. Psalm 145:17-21 The LORD is righteous in all His ways, Gracious in all His works. 18 The LORD is near to all who call upon Him, To all who call upon Him in truth. 19 He will fulfill the desire of those who fear Him; He also will hear their cry and save them. 20 The LORD preserves all who love Him, But all the wicked He will destroy. 21 My mouth shall speak the praise of the LORD, And all flesh shall bless His holy name Forever and ever.  Easton’s Bible Dictionary gives an excellent summary concerning God’s providence. Many religious people are seeking to remove personal responsibility for what they say and do. Yet, God’s nature will not force us to act in such and such a way, nor does Satan have the ability to force us to sin. Each one of us are held accountable and we would do well to take time to study these two subjects. “Providence literally means foresight, but is generally used to denote God's preserving and governing all things by means of second causes (Ps 18:35; 63:8; Ac 17:28; Col 1:17; Heb 1:3). God's providence extends to the natural world (Ps 104:14; 135:5-7; Ac 14:17), the brute creation (Ps 104:21-29; Mt 6:26; 10:29), and the affairs of men (1Ch 16:31; Ps 47:7; Pr 21:1; Job 12:23; Da 2:21; 4:25), and of individuals (1Sa 2:6; Ps 18:30; Lu 1:53; Jas 4:13-15). It extends also to the free actions of men (Ex 12:36; 1Sa 24:9-15; Ps 33:14,15; Pr 16:1; 19:21; 20:24; 21:1), and things sinful (2Sa 16:10; 24:1; Ro 11:32; Ac 4:27,28), as well as to their good actions (Php 2:13; 4:13; 2Co 12:9,10; Eph 2:10; Ga 5:22-25). “As regards sinful actions of men, they are represented as occurring by God's permission (Ge 45:5; 50:20. Comp. 1Sa 6:6; Ex 7:13; 14:17; Ac 2:3; 3:18; 4:27,28), and as controlled (Ps 76:10) and overruled for good (Ge 50:20; Ac 3:13). God does not cause or approve of sin, but only limits, restrains, overrules it for good. “The mode of God's providential government is altogether unexplained. We only know that it is a fact that God does govern all his creatures and all their actions; that this government is universal (Ps 103:17-19), particular (Mt 10:29-31), efficacious (Ps 33:11; Job 23:13), embraces events apparently contingent (Pr 16:9,33; 19:21; 21:1), is consistent with his own perfection (2Ti 2:13), and to his own glory (Ro 9:17; 11:36).”   Dave and Joanne Beckley Doing The Lord's Work In Zimbabwe Les and Linda Maydell are featured in this issue of Our Hope.  One of the challenges that I personally have encountered since we added the Sojourning in Distant Lands page is the abundance of fascinating and touching stories included in the letters and newsletters from those who are living and working in these far away and difficult places.  The problem is trying to choose which stories to include and which ones to omit due to lack of space.  One cannot help but be touched by the trials and hardships that are daily occurrences for those who, in this case live in the southern part of Africa.   I am thankful for Joanne Beckley’s invaluable assistance in putting this information together each month.  By way of introduction to the Maydells, I will use some of Linda’s own words. To locate the countries mentioned in her letter and in the excerpts from their newsletters, see the map at the bottom of the page.   Cindy Les and Linda Maydell We like to share the things that we experience – because we hope that the Christians we meet and the experiences we share with them will encourage others as we have been encouraged. We feel very blessed to have been given these different/interesting opportunities to do the Lord’s work.      We live in Nylstroom (or Modimolle – African name), a small town about 100 miles north of Pretoria. Les was born in Pretoria and was converted in his late 20’s. It was not long before he began preaching and saving his money to go to Florida College – where we met. (I grew up in St.Louis.)       We lived in Pretoria over 20 years, but moved out of the pollution about 8 years ago because of Les’s health. (By God’s grace, Les is a two-time cancer survivor.) About 3-4  years ago, our youngest child left for Florida College, and so that freed us to travel for longer periods of time. We spend 2-3 weeks away and 1-2 weeks at home. When we are at home, we travel on Sunday mornings to various congregations within a 100-mile radius of our house; and there is a small congregation that meets in our house on Sunday evenings. We travel by invitation to different congregations in Zimbabwe, Namibia, Botswana, Mozambique, and South Africa.   Linda Some definitions to keep in mind as you read kyaya ("kigh-yah") is the family living area , consisting of several separate mud huts with grass roofs - living/dining rooms, bedrooms and a special kitchen with walls only half-way up to let out the smoke from the cooking fires.  It also insists of a chicken coop, an open storage bin on stilts to hold corn, sorghum and millet before it is shucked or ground, an enclosed small hut with various “rooms” for beans and ground grain, and various useful trees such as papaya, banana or mango. The entire area is enclosed by a hedge or fence of thorns. There is not one blade of grass, and the dirt is swept daily. kraal (“crawl”), Just outside the khaya is the kraal (“crawl”), a small circular fence made of tree posts planted right up against one another, where oxen or goats, etc are kept at night for protection. Surrounding all this are a few acres of fields, also enclosed by thorn fences, particularly to keep goats and other animals from eating the crops. From the Maydell's May 2007 Newsletter Les:  "On our way to the next scheduled meeting at Silalatshani, about 150 miles further north, we were stopped by a brother who had been standing next to the road all day. He diverted us to Ntunteni, a brand-new congregation which had started as a result of two Christian women from Silalatshani talking about the Bible as they worked together in the fields. A woman from Ntunteni overheard them and asked questions. After her conversion, she began walking 8 miles (one way) to services each Sunday. The Silalatshani brethren, seeing her commitment, decided to try to start a new work in her village by holding a gospel meeting there. This woman then went to every house in her village and invited them to the meeting. About 15-20 were baptized. We arrived a few weeks later. It was a wonderful experience to teach so many babes and prospects. It was also wonderful to see how brethren walked many miles from other congregations to support this effort. We rejoiced to see three obey the gospel. If we remember correctly, thirteen obeyed the gospel during our 2-week visit." Linda:  "Many times when people are undergoing severe trials, they may wonder, 'Why me?' But when I think of how very much we have compared to the brethren we spend most of our time with, I also wonder, 'Why me?' I really don’t know why I am so blessed when so many around me, who are just as spiritually minded, are not.       "A few days later, we visited Ntunteni. After I taught, some women came up to me and told me that a woman in the khaya next door was requesting that we come and pray for her. (It turned out that she was the daughter of the woman who was the original Christian in that area.) A few of us went to do that. The woman, a widow, (I am ashamed to say that I have forgotten her name) was emaciated, almost too ill from AIDS to stand, and also suffering from a terrible urinary tract infection. She had no medication – sometimes the rural clinics have paracetamol (eg. Tylenol). She was lying on a bed in a round, grass-roofed, mud-brick hut with a dirt/dung floor – spotlessly clean. She had a few clothes hanging on a nail on the back of the door and a small table with a few possessions stacked neatly on it. The rest of the hut was covered with grass mats for us to sit on as we visited. Some of her TEN children stood anxiously around the walls and outside the door.      "After prayers, (and after I had given the woman some medication left to me by Dr Kevin who visited us last year) as we were walking back to the meeting, I turned and spoke to my two translators. Bigboy’s wife, Ures, had just buried her 13-year-old niece that they had raised as their own daughter (because her parents had died of AIDS and passed the disease on to her). Senzeni, who had walked about 20 miles to the meeting, had just buried her husband two months before (AIDS) – and 5 infant children before that. “What do you think?” I asked.  Tactfully, Ures replied, “I think it will be very difficult for this woman to recover.” Senzeni added, “I think she is suffering from the same illness as her husband.” I said to Ures and Senzeni, “Please find out if this woman has been taught the gospel. She is too weak to make it to the river (about a mile away), but since we are here, we will be able to erect the portable baptistry right outside the door of her hut.” It seems that the woman had been taught by some of her older children, and when spoken to, she replied, “Yes, I need to be ready to meet the Lord at any time. And please also speak to my neighbour. She is ill like me and also ready to be baptized.”  Young women carried water in buckets from the river to the baptistry until it was filled.       "The lady was too ill to stand up after her baptism, but sisters picked her up out of the water and carried her inside her hut. I doubt she is alive today – but she can be with the Lord. Why was I so blessed with Christian parents who remained faithful to each other and taught me to be pure so that I and my children have not died of this horrible disease? Why are Les and I so blessed with the finances necessary to eat in such a way that we have could have health and strength? Why have you been blessed enough to give on the first day of the week so that congregations can support men to preach the gospel all over the world? Maybe one of the reasons is so that some woman with a good heart in the middle of Zimbabwe could have a portable baptistery brought to her door."      (Note:  Linda has since written a letter to me saying that the woman died a few weeks later.  Cindy) From the Maydell's June 2007 Newsletter Linda:   "The very first and most important thing is greeting every person. “We are seeing you, mother.” “Did you get up?” “How are you?” “How are your children?” This is accompanied by a special triple hand shake. If a person only learns to greet in the local language, heart-doors are immediately opened. When I first came to Africa, I wondered why I was having such a hard time getting people to help me in shops – it was because I was simply saying hello and stating my business – I was not first asking about the person’s health!     Gene Tope, who lived and worked in South Africa for many years made the trip back to that country with his wife, Betty from his home in Chesterfield, Virginia to officiate the memorial service.       Paul Williams, who currently lives and preaches in South Africa writes that Basil was Gene Tope’s “Timothy”.  He was a young preacher working with Gene in Krugersdorp, South Africa in 1968. He faithfully laboured in the Lord there, in Port Elizabeth, and then for many years in the Durban area among Indian brethren.  In Port Elizabeth about 36 years ago he suffered a massive heart attack, but he recovered well and God gave him many years of fruitful service. UNCLE BASIL CASS A SOLDIER OF CHRIST, GONE HOME Written by his niece Cheryl Buchanan White River, South Africa      The first thing that comes to mind when I think of Uncle Basil, is his passion for singing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Often we would get to the Cass household and Uncle Basil would be in his recliner with a hymn book in his hand, practicing a new hymn or perfecting an old one - in times of happiness and sadness. He sat at the bedside of his dying aged mother, many years ago, singing and then led the singing at her funeral service.      He, with Aunty Gloria at his side, supporting him in working for the Lord, made a great team and example to many. For a number of years, he had Bible studies every evening, except Saturdays.      I was always intrigued by his dedication to study and learn more about God’s word, when he and Aunty Gloria were a young married couple. He would travel to Bro. Gene Tope’s house on his little motorbike a few times a week - working at a secular job during the day and then studying God’s word by night.      His love for the truth and his brethren often stressed him and put him in a depressed state during times of conflict in the church.      Then there was his great love for his family, both spiritual and physical family - this was always evident, to the point of being very firm, but caring and loving under very difficult circumstances.  I always felt very much a part of the Cass family and have many happy memories of being with them.      It was through Uncle Basil and Aunty Gloria that our family came to know the gospel and our common bond in Christ was the reason we have always enjoyed a close relationship.      Lastly, his incredible sense of humor! Uncle Basil loved to joke and tease and had a hearty laugh.      We know that God will comfort his family and brethren and help them through the years ahead.      Uncle Basil has left a legacy of love for the gospel, not only to his own family, but to many others as well!      He will be greatly missed by brethren and family alike, for many different reasons.                                                                        ~  Cheryl Buchanan      The family wrote the following poem in his honor: "You toiled so hard for those you loved. You said goodbye to none. Your spirit flew before we knew Your work on earth was done. We miss you now, our hearts are sore, As time goes by, we miss you more. Your loving smile, your gentle face -- No one can fill your vacant place. Your life was love and labor. Your love for your family, true. You did the best for all of us. We will always remember you." June 2007: Our writer for this month is Ellen Baize. She grew up in Zimbabwe when her parents, Foy and Margaret Short were preaching and teaching there. Ellen has the unique experience of being raised in a country very different from the United States. She wrote the following article about her memories of growing up in Zimbabwe about 13 years ago while her parents were still living there. In 1995 Foy and Margaret Short moved to White House, Tennessee, after living in Zimbabwe (formerly known as Rhodesia) for 48 years. Ellen says she is blessed to have them living one and a half states away. Ellen, thank you for sharing some of your experiences and what you learned growing up in a distant land. Cindy This is the picture of our family in December 1965, with one additional person. The little girl sitting beside mother went with us to South Africa. Dad held a meeting, then we spent a week camping -- one of our few family vacations. Left to right: Standing: Jim, Harold & Ellen (me). Sitting: Kay, Foy (Dad), Margaret (Mom) & Marianne de Koch A CHILD OF THE HARVEST FIELD "To the Harvest field I will gladly go, In the service of my King." By Ellen Baize This was a song of special meaning in our family. I am not only the child of missionaries, but the niece of missionaries, the sister of a missionary and the granddaughter of missionaries. I am a citizen of the United States, but often I feel like a foreigner in my own country, and another country often seems more like home. My parents' decision to spend their lives teaching the Word of God in Africa has had a lasting effect on me. I heard two men, who spent most of their adult lives preaching in Africa, wonder if they were fair to their children when they chose to spend their lives preaching the Gospel in a foreign country. I can't answer for every child. I answer only for myself, and this is my answer to them. Yes, there have been challenges I have faced, which I probably would not have faced if I had been raised In the USA. First I live in confusion as to which is my "home" country. On paper and through training, I know that I am an American. I love the USA. But I also love Zimbabwe and when I think of home, I think of Zimbabwe. As a child I knew I was different because I was an American, and I was often treated differently because my peers knew that I was American. My home life was subtly different because of the American influence of my parents. When I came to the USA I was still different. In many ways I had developed customs, manners of speech, ideas that were not American. I will spend my life wishing I could live in both places at once, that I could enjoy the best of both countries always. However, the positive side is that I have learned that true happiness and contentment does not come from where you live, but from how you live. Living in 2 different societies has helped me develop tolerance and long-suffering. I also know that my eternal home will be the best of both countries plus lots more! Another challenge I have faced has been loneliness. My father tells of his first Christmas in Alabama. On Christmas Eve he went for a walk. Inside the brightly lit houses he saw families enjoying being together. He was alone, no family to visit. The sight filled him with longing for home, for his parents who were in Africa. That story still causes me to cry, because I know how he felt. I have had similar experiences. I see other families getting together often (more often than every 5 or 6 years) and wish. But I have learned that I am never really alone. God is always with me. God has blessed me with many Christian friends, a God-fearing husband and 3 beautiful children and 6 wonderful grandchildren. My children have 2 sets of "adopted" grandparents. Christian friends invited me into their homes during my college years. Many of them will never realize just how much their hospitality alleviated my aloneness. This challenge has not only taught me about the faithfulness of God, but helps me realize the importance of fulfilling his command on hospitality There have been many times when I wanted my mother and could have used her counsel in dealing with life's challenges, big and little. There have been many times when I wanted to pick up the phone and ask her advice about a child's fever, or how to cook something. But I have had a mother to whom I could write and share the joys and sorrows in my life. Her mother had died before she went to Africa. God has indeed blessed me. I have also learned to depend more on God for help through life's crises. So for each challenge God has provided learning experiences and blessings. I have learned many wonderful lessons because I am a child of missionaries. The greatest and most valuable lesson has been about faith In God. I've seen many wonderful examples of faith and total dependence on God in the lives of my parents, grandparents, relatives and others serving God in Africa. My grandparents made the decision to go to Africa to teach. As soon as they had enough money for passage on a ship, they went. They had no promise of support once they were in Africa, but they knew that God had commanded, "Go into all the world and preach the gospel" so they believed that he would provide for their needs. Their needs were always met. This type of faith was what I saw in my childhood. I remember times when a congregation would stop sending their support, sometimes with one month's notice, sometimes without any notice. Yet we always had food to eat, clothes to wear and a place to live. Whenever dad got an increase in support, he increased the amount he spent for preaching or teaching. Extra money meant another teaching opportunity. My parents' priority in life was very obvious and I learned. I learned about hospitality. Mother has cooked meals for over 30 people many times. And once she did it holding a baby in her arms! Friends referred to our house and my grandparents' house as "Grand central Station" because we had so many visitors. One time we had teenagers sleeping in two tents plus one couple sleeping in their station wagon in our yard because so many were visiting (and we only had one bathroom in our house!) Never did I hear mother or grandmother complain about all the extra work. They did what was needed cheerfully because they loved God. Both women experienced situations few of us today want to face. They faced whatever came their way with a deep and abiding trust in God's care. I remember a particular time of discouragement and frustration for dad, Ray Votaw and Gene Tope. But I never saw them give up or blame God. They gave encouragement to each other, trusted in God and kept doing the best that they could. I learned about steadfastness from their example. Yes, there have been challenges to face because my parents were missionaries, but I will never regret being a missionary's child. My life has been blessed and enriched, and these blessings far outweigh the challenges. As I write this, I see more clearly that the challenges I have faced are not necessarily very different from the challenges faced by children born and reared in the USA. The blessings are also experienced in the USA. The only real difference is the packaging! A father's career decision affects his family, whether he preaches the Gospel in the USA or overseas, or works in a secular job here or abroad. Growing up in a foreign country does leave a child with challenges to face. Growing up as the child of a preacher, or elder also presents challenges for the family, especially the children. Growing up in the USA presents challenges as well. Wherever we are, the love and guidance of Godly parents matters more than the location of the home. Continue in the faith grounded and settled, And be not moved away from the hope of the gospel. Colossians 1:23 RETURNING HOME Reverse Culture Shock by Joanne Beckley In 1991, I researched and wrote an article with this title concerning “reverse culture shock.” My husband and I had just returned from living 16 years in South Africa. We needed help to better understand what was really happening. Why were we having some difficulty in being Americans again? Because much of my research came from advice given to military families, I was asked to adapt the information for Christians. Not only did this effort help my own understanding, but I recommend that every Christian read this article in order to either understand their own difficulties in returning to the States, or to help other preachers and their families who are returning to the States. Joanne It is difficult to describe the emotional turmoil members of a family deal with when they return to the United States, after living in a foreign country for several years, whether 3 or 20. Obviously, all adjustments are more difficult the longer the separation. But why should we have problems? After all, we are Americans, are we not? Optimism or Pessimism? When we leave the States, we have to relinquish close physical ties with our families and with our sisters and brothers in Christ. We also face giving up cultural supports that make life comfortable and secure. Because of the pain we felt on separation, we at first limit contact with others in the new country, making an investment only in short-term relationships – knowing we will have to leave them when we return. As time continues, we begin to open up and trust in deeper friendships. The longer we stay, the stronger we love. On the other hand, we may find it seemingly impossible to settle overseas and this breeds feelings of defeat and pessimism (in you, and therefore in your children). I have learned from my own experience, and that of others, that how we live in a foreign land will become the tools we work with on our return to the States. What happens overseas? Each of us develops and accumulates special abilities and skills to adapt to new situations successfully (new languages, customs, people). We develop a wider understanding of the world and her needs. We face new trials and overcome them. We are stronger spiritually, for if we are to survive, we will face ourselves, whether we are indeed children of God. Upon our return to the States, we discover that these developed skills and deeper insights will separate us from others. It is a fact that we are not the same people we were when we left – and others will recognize this. We will have to accept that our experiences can never be shared by those friends and family left behind. They have not had the same privilege of the opened door that we have had. Conversations will die and eyes will glaze over as we excitedly describe our wonderful experience. We are left feeling emotionally let down, silenced, and lonely. Returning to the States means we must leave a significant part of ourselves behind. We have to say goodbye to cherished friendships that developed through intense mutual needs – we who were alone in a foreign land, those we teach being new Christians. Goodbyes are difficult, but necessary. The grieving process begins, and must be completed. Each returning member of the family will have to adjust to being “Americans” again. so why am I having so much trouble? Is this a lack of faith?”) We may also need to look at several areas that should be corrected – anger, pride, or self-interest. Most of us make a good surface adjustment, but gradually we will have to face our feelings of uncertainty, alienation, anger, guilt and disappointment. These feelings cause discomfort, rootlessness and vague dissatisfaction with our lives. We will have difficulty pinpointing the source of our difficulties. We think we are adjusting but we are very uncomfortable with the adjustment. (“Christians are to be all things to all men, so why am I having so much trouble? Is this a lack of faith?”) We may also need to look at several areas that should be corrected – anger, pride, or self-interest. What can you do to help yourself? * Say goodbye so that you can soon enter as whole-heartedly as possible into your new beginnings. * Recognize and accept that grief is necessary. Accept that there is an emotional cost in adjustment. * Recognize that pride can be a heavy companion during your period of adjustment. From feeling fairly confident and competent overseas, you will experience real or imagined judgment from fellow mature preachers and Christians. * Acknowledge that anger will be expressed toward yourself, toward each other for making life difficult, and toward "the system," American customs, including in the church – all contributing to feelings of anxiety, depression, self-preoccupation, or insomnia. This sense of powerlessness and insecurity where everything seemed to be on top of you makes one feel as if he is fumbling in the dark. Laughter is forgotten and burdens seemed unfair to bear. * Face the feeling of guilt for being given so many gifts and becoming in a very short time seemingly just as affluent as other Americans and NEVER as you had been overseas. There will also be feelings of guilt that you have left your overseas brethren "in the lurch.” * Integrate the past with the present. Reflect on the positive. Make a list of personal strengths and let them balance feelings of inadequacy. * Seek out other Christians who have previously experienced reverse culture shock. Loneliness can actually paralyze. False pride will stand in the way. * Focus on daily tasks. One day at a time. * Talk with your spouse and children and make sure each one knows and accepts what each one is going through. * Return to a learning environment, studying with other preachers, etc. You not only provide yourself with common ground but it will give you a chance to admit neediness. As a student you can assist yourself in your battle with pride. Acknowledge that returning home is a learning experience – a new adventure! Each family member will differ in the reentry process, both in duration and degree of difficulty. It is our expectations that do not match reality that give us trouble. We are determined to mix a new palette of colors and we want everyone to rejoice in an amazing picture, our very own creation. If we would only realize we are a potpourri of the world and not make such an issue of it, Americans will not fight us. Let us stop reminding people of our “foreign” habits. We can learn to live quietly and realize that judgments by others may be wholly imagined by us. Coming back can truly be another adventure, educational, amusing, confusing, rewarding, “knee scraping,” and fun all at once. It may take weeks, months, or even years to complete the transitional process as we integrate new and old experiences. A Direct Note about our Children and their specialized needs. Living in another country, if positively approached, gives tremendous potential for American young people. This positive attitude can also be used when preparing our children for returning to their land of birth. Talk together about yours and their expectations of America. Correct and weed out non-reality, yet retain their dreams. Seek personal friendships via the internet with teen Christians in the States who will “be there” when they return. Children need to know U.S. dress styles, hair length, how to pump gas, no hitchhiking, etc. They need to understand U.S. currency. Teens need a working skill – “all” teens have jobs in America. Peer acceptance is crucial, and teenagers are very susceptible to re-entry stress. It is not uncommon for them to withdraw and become depressed, seeking unacceptable methods (drugs, alcohol, sex) to find acceptance. Re-entry is also a time for tremendous spiritual challenges when teens find that American Christians aren’t as perfect as they had thought. How can others help? Christians should make themselves aware that returning home is a difficult job, emotionally and financially. A congregation can develop a support system of continuous care, prayer, and inquiry on behalf of the returning family. If possible, within two-three years of their return, send the preacher & wife back to his overseas work for a 6-week visit/preaching trip. This will help them to complete their adjustment, knowing the goodbyes were not forever. If possible, plan for one of your elders to accompany them, which will increase his awareness in shepherding the family. New relationships are forged and mutual appreciation develops. The fear and intense grief of never seeing their loved ones will be relieved. Let us not create casualties, but rather keep these families whole, able to continue growing in the grace and knowledge of our Lord. Be patient with the grieving process, and try to understand the difficulty that is present in learning to trust and reach out in love again. Remove unnecessary pressures by not being critical of strange and unpredictable behaviors. New relationships have to be based on new acceptable expectations from both sides. Reassure, reassure, reassure them of a job well done, then and now. Winning for Christ! What more could we want.

     I recently read an article by the noted columnist Charles Krauthammer, in which he stated that our exceptionally long, drawn-out political campaigns leading up to the presidential elections serve a useful purpose. He claimed they hone the leadership abilities and organizational qualities of the candidates, which are necessary to running this great country.

     The lengthy process of securing the support and backing of interested brethren when contemplating an international move to preach the gospel in a foreign land also serves a useful purpose in preparing the preacher and his family for the rigors ahead. When we determined to move to South Africa for that purpose, we were repeatedly told we were too young and inexperienced. We were even accused of merely wanting a vacation. The most hurtful of all the accusations, though, came from preaching brethren who intimated we loved our parents and families less than others. Added to these discouragements, was the humiliation of having to go around the country begging for the funds to go. We thank God for all the wonderful brethren who heeded our pleas for help and enabled us to spend the better part of our married life working and living in Africa. The many souls who obeyed the gospel as a result will forever be in your debt.

     In the summer of 1957 Gene and I and our two little girls, Becky and Karen, left our home and brethren in the little town of Cottonwood, Arizona (pop. 1,600) and headed across the United States in an effort to begin fulfilling our dream of evangelizing the metropolis of Johannesburg, Union of South Africa (pop. 1,000,000). Gene was 27 and I was 24 - two very green young people. But, what we lacked in experience, we made up for in faith and enthusiasm. On the way we drove all night across country through a hurricane to reach a speaking appointment in Oklahoma.

     By the time we arrived at my parents’ home in Detroit, we had a part of our monthly support promised, mostly in amounts of $25 and $50, but not all of it and certainly not enough travel funds to get us there. Gene spent a few frantic weeks visiting among the churches in the Detroit metropolitan area. Brethren were sympathetic but not quick to respond.  To my dad’s amazement, Gene went ahead and booked our tickets on Air France for early November, in spite of the shortfall. Three weeks before our scheduled departure, the necessary funds were promised. Whew!

     After a teary goodbye, we left Mom and Dad’s house on October 30 and headed by car to New York via the beautiful Pennsylvania countryside. Driving in New York was a nightmare. One taxicab driver actually got out of his cab and threatened Gene. We thought he was going to punch him in the face. Needless to say, we were very relieved to turn our automobile over to the shipping company.

     Four-year-old Becky and two-year-old Karen were overwhelmed by the hotel and its amenities. When they were served juice on a charger, Becky shouted out, “A glass on a plate?” Everyone knew we were from Hicksville! Later that night we went to a nearby restaurant for supper. We ordered two dinners and then as an after thought ordered something we’d never had before - pizza! While waiting for our order, we glanced at a neighboring table of four adults and saw them being served this huge round dish. We laughed and said wouldn’t it be funny if that’s what we had ordered. Of course, it was and there was no way we could eat all that food. The waitress offered to box the leftovers up for us, but we informed her we were catching a plane that night and couldn’t take it.

     We had purposefully chosen to fly Air France for two reasons. One . . . they had a reputation of always being on time and, Two . . . they had a stopover in Boston where Gene’s brother Joe was attending Harvard University and we had arranged to meet him at the airport. Alas, our plane had engine trouble in the Azores and we were delayed about eight hours with the end result that the stopover in Boston was cancelled. We had no way of contacting Joe so he waited several hours at the airport for us in vain.

     Our plane was a 4-engined DC 7. It looked very small on the runway. Years later we saw one on display in the Smithsonian and it WAS small! But air travel in those days had much to recommend it. The girls were given Wings to wear and a delightful little French story book. All our meals were served on the ground. In Athens we were treated to a 5-course meal in the airport dining room complete with table linen and silver. But I digress. Due to our late arrival in Paris, we had missed our connecting UTA flight to Johannesburg and were put up at the Hotel California by the airline. The cook very graciously sent up cold meats and fruit for our late night meal. We marveled at the marble staircase, the wrought-iron caged elevator and the mysterious bidet.

     Around noon the next day we boarded a South African Airways plane to begin the long journey to Africa. As already stated, we landed in Athens for refueling and supper. We then flew on to Khartoum, arriving about six o’clock in the morning. As the plane’s door was opened and we stepped down the stairs onto the tarmac, it felt like we were stepping into a furnace. I encountered my first Asian toilet at this airport (a hole in the ground). I only discovered too late that both Eastern and Western toilets were available!

     Flying over Africa we were aware of a vast brown continent with occasional oases of green. At night a few sparse flickering lights were all that disturbed the thick darkness. We were excited to view Mt. Kilimanjaro out of the plane’s window! We had an unscheduled overnight stop in Nairobi due to engine trouble. As we took off after refueling, we had only been airborne a few minutes when one of the engines quit. The pilot in a very calm British voice came over the intercom and informed us we could watch a very interesting procedure out of the port windows as he proceeded to dump the fuel we had just taken on. Then he turned around and headed back to the airport. He assured us there was nothing to worry about. However, as he came in for the landing, he suddenly took off again and circled before a second attempt at landing. Once on the ground, we heard a big sigh from the pilot and a very relieved voice saying, “See, I told you there was nothing to it.” The following week a plane crashed in similar circumstances, killing all on board.

     We had a frightening drive to the hotel. The African bus driver seemed very reckless to us as he careened around the curves going full out, horn blaring, heedless of the other various foot and motorized traffic on the road. The hotel seemed to be isolated in the bush but the grounds were beautiful with lush tropical plants of every description and color. I particularly remember the gorgeous bougainvilleas. Upon arrival, the men were called aside and warned to keep the women and children on the hotel grounds at all times because the Mau Mau uprising was still not 100% under control. Of course, I knew nothing of this at the time. As we still did not have access to our luggage, I was feeling very grubby wearing the same clothes we had started our journey in. My dress was very wrinkled and I asked Gene to find an iron for me. When he enquired of the manager, he was informed that the hotel possessed a grand ironing room but all the irons had been stolen. Welcome to Africa!

     In due time, another aircraft arrived from Johannesburg to fetch us and we were herded onto the plane. We noticed all of our luggage stacked up on the runway. It had been setting there long enough for thieves to go through and pilfer a few choice items. We discovered later that Gene was minus a new pair of shoes.

     We landed at a tiny airstrip in the bush at a place called Lusaka in Northern Rhodesia (Zambia) to disembark a few passengers. It seemed so remote that I couldn’t help wondering what was calling those people to such an isolated place. Three years later, after traveling the Great North Road (a narrow dirt road) to Lilongwe, Nyasaland, (Malawi) Lusaka seemed like a thriving city to us.

     Though the journey was long with no movies or TV for entertainment, the flight crew was attentive and the meals were wonderful. Tea was served constantly (or so it seemed to me then) and breakfast consisted of boerewors, (a type of sausage) scrambled eggs, fruit, etc. We dined like kings! A far cry from the frozen cardboard-tasting meals served by most airlines today. The excitement of the trip itself was entertainment enough for us back then. After another stop in Southern Rhodesia (Zimbabwe) at present- day Harare (Salisbury back then), we eventually arrived at our final destination. Our African odyssey was about to begin. Little did we know then that South Africa and its peoples would become inextricably woven into the thread of our lives forever.

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