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•  I think there are an awful lot of brethren and an awful lot of churches
who are going to have to answer for how they treat the widows in their midst. My dear husband has been dead for 8 years and
I still miss him every hour of every day and struggle spiritually because of his loss of leadership. But no one has ever even
asked me how I am doing spiritually or if there is anything they can do. Church is not a place of comfort, its a place to
miss that one person more painfully because you feel like no one really cares. And one member in our congregation, as he made
announcements, told the members to make sure they checked on a young wife because her husband was out of town on business.
Didn't seem to occur to him that her husband chose to be gone, but mine didn't. And at least she could pick up the
phone and talk to hers, I can't. But the widow is just supposed to go on as if nothing has happened!!!
• I am still learning to live without my beloved Husband of 52 years. I try to keep busy.
Otherwise, I find myself feeling sorry for my self and very lonely. I'm
a widow and live alone. Please invite me into your family to share in common things. Many people are very attentive
at the beginning, but the loneliness lasts and is sharper weeks and months longer. Call me. Suggest we get together.
Though I initiate contact with others, I sometimes feel like I'm horning in. Hug me. Put an arm around me
or rub my shouldrers. I have lost the human contact of my mate. Call on me for help. I need to feel needed.
Don't always put me with the girls. I long for male conversation (even just listening) at times. Sometimes
I grow weary of woman's talk and just want a male point of view. I have lost my balancer. My husband balanced
my way of thinking by helping me understand his thoughts on subjects. Invite me to sit with you at services or just
come sit by me. Mention something that you loved about my husband or just that you miss him. I don't want
to feel that everyone has forgotten him. Call me or write me a note on his birthday, our anniversary or the date
he died just to let me know you're thinking of me. Tell me that you know my husband would be proud of me for "doing
so well."
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